Chapter 8: THE DEATH OF A HORSE
βThe dinners are better at Γdonβs than at Bombardaβs,β exclaimed ZΓ©phine.
βI prefer Bombarda to Γdon,β declared Blachevelle. βThere is more luxury. It is more Asiatic. Look at the room downstairs; there are mirrors [_glaces_] on the walls.β
βI prefer them [_glaces_, ices] on my plate,β said Favourite.
Blachevelle persisted:β
βLook at the knives. The handles are of silver at Bombardaβs and of bone at Γdonβs. Now, silver is more valuable than bone.β
βExcept for those who have a silver chin,β observed TholomyΓ¨s.
He was looking at the dome of the Invalides, which was visible from Bombardaβs windows.
A pause ensued.
βTholomyΓ¨s,β exclaimed Fameuil, βListolier and I were having a discussion just now.β
βA discussion is a good thing,β replied TholomyΓ¨s; βa quarrel is better.β
βWe were disputing about philosophy.β
βWell?β
βWhich do you prefer, Descartes or Spinoza?β
βDΓ©saugiers,β said TholomyΓ¨s.
This decree pronounced, he took a drink, and went on:β
βI consent to live. All is not at an end on earth since we can still talk nonsense. For that I return thanks to the immortal gods. We lie. One lies, but one laughs. One affirms, but one doubts. The unexpected bursts forth from the syllogism. That is fine. There are still human beings here below who know how to open and close the surprise box of the paradox merrily. This, ladies, which you are drinking with so tranquil an air is Madeira wine, you must know, from the vineyard of Coural das Freiras, which is three hundred and seventeen fathoms above the level of the sea. Attention while you drink! three hundred and seventeen fathoms! and Monsieur Bombarda, the magnificent eating-house keeper, gives you those three hundred and seventeen fathoms for four francs and fifty centimes.β
Again Fameuil interrupted him:β
βTholomyΓ¨s, your opinions fix the law. Who is your favorite author?β
βBerββ
βQuin?β
βNo; Choux.β
And TholomyΓ¨s continued:β
βHonor to Bombarda! He would equal Munophis of Elephanta if he could but get me an Indian dancing-girl, and Thygelion of ChΓ¦ronea if he could bring me a Greek courtesan; for, oh, ladies! there were Bombardas in Greece and in Egypt. Apuleius tells us of them. Alas! always the same, and nothing new; nothing more unpublished by the creator in creation! _Nil sub sole novum_, says Solomon; _amor omnibus idem_, says Virgil; and Carabine mounts with Carabin into the bark at Saint-Cloud, as Aspasia embarked with Pericles upon the fleet at Samos. One last word. Do you know what Aspasia was, ladies? Although she lived at an epoch when women had, as yet, no soul, she was a soul; a soul of a rosy and purple hue, more ardent hued than fire, fresher than the dawn. Aspasia was a creature in whom two extremes of womanhood met; she was the goddess prostitute; Socrates plus Manon Lescaut. Aspasia was created in case a mistress should be needed for Prometheus.β
TholomyΓ¨s, once started, would have found some difficulty in stopping, had not a horse fallen down upon the quay just at that moment. The shock caused the cart and the orator to come to a dead halt. It was a Beauceron mare, old and thin, and one fit for the knacker, which was dragging a very heavy cart. On arriving in front of Bombardaβs, the worn-out, exhausted beast had refused to proceed any further. This incident attracted a crowd. Hardly had the cursing and indignant carter had time to utter with proper energy the sacramental word, _MΓ’tin_ (the jade), backed up with a pitiless cut of the whip, when the jade fell, never to rise again. On hearing the hubbub made by the passers-by, TholomyΓ¨sβ merry auditors turned their heads, and TholomyΓ¨s took advantage of the opportunity to bring his allocution to a close with this melancholy strophe:β
βElle Γ©tait de ce monde ou coucous et carrosses Ont le mΓͺme destin; Et, rosse, elle a vΓ©cu ce que vivant les rosses, Lβespace dβun mΓ’tin!β 3
βPoor horse!β sighed Fantine.
And Dahlia exclaimed:β
βThere is Fantine on the point of crying over horses. How can one be such a pitiful fool as that!β
At that moment Favourite, folding her arms and throwing her head back, looked resolutely at TholomyΓ¨s and said:β
βCome, now! the surprise?β
βExactly. The moment has arrived,β replied TholomyΓ¨s. βGentlemen, the hour for giving these ladies a surprise has struck. Wait for us a moment, ladies.β
βIt begins with a kiss,β said Blachevelle.
βOn the brow,β added TholomyΓ¨s.
Each gravely bestowed a kiss on his mistressβs brow; then all four filed out through the door, with their fingers on their lips.
Favourite clapped her hands on their departure.
βIt is beginning to be amusing already,β said she.
βDonβt be too long,β murmured Fantine; βwe are waiting for you.β